Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
farters have to be the big spoon...
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
