Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
