We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize