pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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