Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car. http://tfl.nu/gqa0
  Replies (8) Good night (612) Bad night (1957)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  what do you have against ST

  (1-540): View more from Virginia

  DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): what do you have against ST (1-540): DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS. http://tfl.nu/zpvl
  Replies (11) Good night (3349) Bad night (947)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (507): hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning. http://tfl.nu/ul21
  Replies (7) Good night (2332) Bad night (645)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  I puked off the balcony.

  (1-831): View more from California

  Not horrible

  (831): View more from California

  Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (831): I puked off the balcony. (1-831): Not horrible (831): Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza. http://tfl.nu/7wv6
  Replies (11) Good night (2445) Bad night (9091)
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (320): I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town http://tfl.nu/1n02
  Replies (32) Good night (4143) Bad night (1132)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?

  (636): View more from Missouri

  anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls? (636): anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence http://tfl.nu/1u56
  Replies (32) Good night (8787) Bad night (1037)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again. http://tfl.nu/nxev
  Replies (16) Good night (806) Bad night (5788)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys http://tfl.nu/u1dh
  Replies (21) Good night (1339) Bad night (3674)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag. http://tfl.nu/vhx8
  Replies (8) Good night (5062) Bad night (1150)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital http://tfl.nu/fnso
  Replies (12) Good night (1244) Bad night (808)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning. http://tfl.nu/8h0t
  Replies (5) Good night (621) Bad night (1053)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me

  (1-724): View more from Pennsylvania

  He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me (1-724): He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit. http://tfl.nu/ml5w
  Replies (5) Good night (1498) Bad night (527)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well. http://tfl.nu/esbu
  Replies (5) Good night (1084) Bad night (367)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me. http://tfl.nu/axuf
  Replies (10) Good night (443) Bad night (1394)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing http://tfl.nu/jyrs
  Replies (4) Good night (425) Bad night (294)

Randomize