Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up

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  (248): Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up http://tfl.nu/y2zz
  Replies (1) Good night (870) Bad night (1255)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out

  (607): View more from New York

  what a beautiful fairy tale

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  (315): he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out (607): what a beautiful fairy tale http://tfl.nu/50v3
  Replies (33) Good night (10933) Bad night (910)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.

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  (724): If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground. (724): Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday. http://tfl.nu/bc8e
  Replies (140) Good night (3101) Bad night (719)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again

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  (508): Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again http://tfl.nu/g8s7
  Replies (39) Good night (2966) Bad night (694)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  Please don't use social media to get back at me.

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  (646): Please don't use social media to get back at me. http://tfl.nu/bgjj
  Replies (11) Good night (688) Bad night (2897)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels

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  (225): i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels http://tfl.nu/zg26
  Replies (58) Good night (924) Bad night (8293)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...

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  (217): I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs... http://tfl.nu/dm06
  Replies (53) Good night (4405) Bad night (816)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss

  (301): View more from Maryland

  OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?

  (518): View more from New York

  Doritoesssssss

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  (518): All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss (301): OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with? (518): Doritoesssssss http://tfl.nu/528p
  Replies (41) Good night (13468) Bad night (1500)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.

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  (203): I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole. http://tfl.nu/9iug
  Replies (17) Good night (1403) Bad night (3302)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs

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  (724): Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs http://tfl.nu/vayg
  Replies (5) Good night (1191) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????

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  (708): I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY???? http://tfl.nu/05jz
  Replies (7) Good night (1447) Bad night (423)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?

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  (410): Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole? http://tfl.nu/dt20
  Replies (5) Good night (971) Bad night (567)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  These people don't understand my stages of drunk

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  (850): These people don't understand my stages of drunk http://tfl.nu/g6eb
  Replies (2) Good night (491) Bad night (293)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm

  (1+61): View more from

  At least it wasn't your drinking arm

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  (+61): In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm (1+61): At least it wasn't your drinking arm http://tfl.nu/wwzo
  Replies (2) Good night (670) Bad night (279)
• Favorite

  (848): View more from New Jersey

  Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.

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  (848): Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem. http://tfl.nu/e34z
  Replies (2) Good night (453) Bad night (916)

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