He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
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