I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize