p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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