just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
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but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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