at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize