I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
