"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
