That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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