So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
smell my finger.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
