New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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