he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize
