Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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