My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
