I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize