I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
