Pregnant stripper...not hot.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Randomize
