If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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