Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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