can u get pink eye on your cock?
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
