He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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