I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
