when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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