Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Randomize
