Don't you send me to vm
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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