We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again