so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i want to fuck
it's pretty self explanatory
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing