And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?