How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
These 17 Parents Decided to Cut Contact With Their Horrible Kids
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.