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we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
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