Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?