i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
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we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
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What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?