On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.