You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom