And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content