I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?