Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday