I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.