I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
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Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
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They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.