She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey