when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
The 17 Most Horrible Things Said To Online Daters
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle