He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?