not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
My vagina just recognized that song.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed