Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?