he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
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just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
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he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.