Texts From Last Night

Last Night in California (626)

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  (626): View more from California

  Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.

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  I see you met someone special

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  (626): Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection. (1-626): I see you met someone special http://tfl.nu/ncbz
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  Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.

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  (626): Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long. http://tfl.nu/2nw2
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  It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass

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  (626): It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass http://tfl.nu/014k
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  I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?

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  (626): I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night? http://tfl.nu/9qof
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  Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why

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  (626): Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why http://tfl.nu/74jl
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  I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.

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  (626): I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger. http://tfl.nu/jsvx
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  I reek of latex and grilled onions.

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  Mission accomplished.

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  (626): I reek of latex and grilled onions. (626): Mission accomplished. http://tfl.nu/k1oy
  Replies (4) Good night (522) Bad night (325)
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  It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."

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  (626): It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed." http://tfl.nu/13ua
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  It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me

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  And a merry methadone to all

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  (909): It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me (626): And a merry methadone to all http://tfl.nu/a55x
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  you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup

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  (626): you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup http://tfl.nu/p78v
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  My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.

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  (626): My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza. http://tfl.nu/x0uu
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  Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy

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  (626): Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy http://tfl.nu/8u1j
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  AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN

  (1-626): View more from California

  we're fated to lesbian

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  (626): AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN (1-626): we're fated to lesbian http://tfl.nu/bohp
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  So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?

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  (626): So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room? http://tfl.nu/5xcr
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  I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.

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  (626): I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime. http://tfl.nu/zedi
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