She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
20 People Who Caught Their Significant Others Cheating and Hand Over Some Major Karma
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
33 Memes You’ll Find Uncomfortably Relatable If You’ve Ever Been Through A Messy Breakup
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher