And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza