thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.